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Draco Malfoy's Diary
Musings of a Teenage Genius...
I swear on Circe's lopsided bosom, I have no bloody idea what is… 
11th-Feb-2010 08:34 pm
Huh?
I swear on Circe's lopsided bosom, I have no bloody idea what is going on with me lately. With all my poise and grace and, let's face it, undeniably superior posture, I must be getting clumsy. Not only have I fallen down the stairs in the past few days but I've almost impaled myself on an ill-placed knife, got shocked by that ridiculous muggle hair appliance of Blaise's and then I almost got knocked over by that stupid red sports car.

I must be losing my mind. Someone will pay for this. I must find someone to sue.
Comments 
11th-Feb-2010 08:48 pm (UTC)
Sue yourself, for being so clumsy. Haha, that would be funny if you sued yourself. Which side would I be a character witness for!

That aside.. I don't think you should worry about it. I'm sure it's nothing. You're probably just tired from working so hard. It's making you have paranoid delusions. You need to rest. Relax.
11th-Feb-2010 08:53 pm (UTC)
Oh shut up. You'd be a witness for both sides, you're hot for me like that.

I'm going to bed, all these brushes with death are tiresome.
11th-Feb-2010 08:58 pm (UTC)
Indeed?

You're being dramatic, you've just tripped a few times, you have not had brushes with death, don't be ridiculous. Next you'll be saying there's someone out to get you. But yes, go to bed. I'll bring you some warm milk.
11th-Feb-2010 09:02 pm (UTC)
Yes, indeed.

Silence. You'll be sorry if someone killed me. You couldn't function without me, no doubt you'll wither away itno nothing.

Better not be lukewarm milk.
11th-Feb-2010 09:15 pm (UTC)
That sounds disgusting, warm milk. You'd be better off with scotch or something.
11th-Feb-2010 09:21 pm (UTC)
Scotch to bed. How wino of you, Pansy.
11th-Feb-2010 09:30 pm (UTC)
Puts you right to sleep.

God, I miss having a drink.
11th-Feb-2010 09:34 pm (UTC)
Darling, you have to stop being pregnant all the time, it's a nightmare on our social lives.
11th-Feb-2010 09:51 pm (UTC)
True.

One month to go!
11th-Feb-2010 09:22 pm (UTC)
What is it with you and warm milk. I swear you're on a vendetta.

Besides, he's not allowed to have scotch, due to his heart. He's allowed half a glass of wine every other day, but I think warm milk still works much better.
11th-Feb-2010 09:30 pm (UTC)
It's disgusting, that's what it is.

A swallow of scotch won't kill him, unlike other things.
11th-Feb-2010 09:34 pm (UTC)
Sigh. If you say so. I for one enjoy a nice warm milk every once in a while.

Yes, true. I just don't want him to make a habit of it. Yes, other things. Like cholesterol.
11th-Feb-2010 09:50 pm (UTC)
Yes, cholesterol. Or, you know, being mowed down by a car or eating poison. Things like that.
11th-Feb-2010 09:55 pm (UTC)
Oh, well, yes. But the chances of those things happening are next to nil. Statistically speaking.

I think cholesterol is what we should be watching out for.
11th-Feb-2010 10:35 pm (UTC)
Well, Draco has a real tendency to draw freak accidents to himself, don't you think?
12th-Feb-2010 07:42 am (UTC)
Yes, well, everyone knows he's a tad clumsy. Naturally he would have a few unavoidable accidents here and there. Perfectly natural.

Enough about Draco, let's talk about you. You're almost done, that must be exciting.
13th-Feb-2010 03:01 pm (UTC)
Oh, yes, thrilling.

Enough about me, let's go back to Draco.
13th-Feb-2010 05:58 pm (UTC)
Strange how obsessed with Draco you are lately. It's very suspicious, Pansy. People are going to talk. Let's drop the Draco subject.

Let's talk about how I might be the father of your child, that's a more interesting topic, i think.
14th-Feb-2010 03:52 am (UTC)
RON IS THE FATHER OF MY CHILD!

I am so angry with you right now.
14th-Feb-2010 09:04 am (UTC)
Why? :(

Well, I am so angry with you right now too!
11th-Feb-2010 09:17 pm (UTC)
I'm perfectly capable of functioning without you. I've been, haven't I. Of course, I'm sure I will miss you very much, Draco. I'll wait at least six months to a year before I carry on with my life.

Don't worry, it will be the perfect temperature to put you to sleep.
11th-Feb-2010 09:35 pm (UTC)
You'll off yourself without me. You know it, I know it, everyone knows it. You're just embarrassing yourself by saying otherwise.

Fine. It really better not be lukewarm!
11th-Feb-2010 09:45 pm (UTC)
Hardly. I don't know if you've noticed, but we've both grown fairly self-sufficient over the last few months. I think we can both do fine without each other these days. Well, you'd have to hire a dietitian, but still.

Why do you care if it's lukewarm! Better if it's lukewarm, at least you won't burn yourself then!
11th-Feb-2010 09:03 pm (UTC) - [mug]
Poisoned lukewarm milk? :D Please tell me it puts Draco in a coma and Blaise thinks he's dead and tries to bury him? XD
11th-Feb-2010 09:18 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Oh my god!!! That needs to happen!!! Hahah, how is he going to explain himself when Draco wakes up in the middle of that?
11th-Feb-2010 09:21 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Oh, Draco'll come back after a week, covered in dirt, like in Kill Bill 2 XD XD
11th-Feb-2010 09:25 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
I never saw Kill Bill 2! D: I watched the first one and then always meant to finish but didn't!

Hahah, yes, I agree with this plan. What's he gonna say when he gets back?? How's Blaise going to explain Draco's disappearance for a week???
11th-Feb-2010 09:27 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
I imagine he'll say Draco's on a trip right? XD When people enquire, "Oh, he's on vacation. Somewhere in Peru. With the Mayans and Incas or whoever they have there"
11th-Feb-2010 09:31 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Haha, alright. I like how he's so unconcerned and casual about the whole thing. Blaise has turned out to have a pretty cool head afterall! :D He's totally going to find Draco's vault keys and 'reorganize' his finances in his absence.

Will Draco know that Blaise tried to kill him when he wakes up and digs himself out of his shallow grave?
11th-Feb-2010 09:33 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
I don't think Draco'll remember. It's all a blur. Pansy won't be happy with Blaise XD

But hahaha, Blaise is so evil, offing his husband and changing his will and everything. Scarlett will cry like a bitch, she's a total queen over Draco.
11th-Feb-2010 09:42 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Hahaha, no, she will not be happy with him at all. :)

Hehe, yes, Blaise has a very sharp evil streak that surfaces every now and then. He'd remain cool and evil for a week or two after he's killed Draco until it finally hit him and THEN he'd wither away into nothing like Draco said. :D

Damien will keep looking at Blaise all suspicious like. They will play sleuth, he'll keep asking Blaise questions to try to make him slip up and give away the game. Blaise will buy Scarlet lots of pink things to make up for Draco's absence.
11th-Feb-2010 09:47 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Bwahahaa! Wither away how? He held it up good though! Doesn't help that Draco surrounds himself in pictures of himself, flexing and posing. They'll all be looking at Blaise in suspicion.

Damien is so smart! And Scar is so easy! That makes sense :D
11th-Feb-2010 09:53 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
He'd go sit at Draco's grave and talk to him every day. He's probably get distracted and forget to eat his meals every once in a while and he'd stop dressing up and wear huge comfy unflattering sweaters all the time. His children would be his only comfort, but even then he'll still have a sadness in his eyes. :P

Haha, oh god, do they really flex? Blaise would so roll his eyes at that. But really, it's the portraits of himself that he'd have to watch out for. They would be pretty scornful if they found out Blaise had killed off the love of their life.

It's true! :D And poor Dante will just not understand any of it at all. He'll get all clingy to Blaise again.
13th-Feb-2010 12:01 am (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand Draco is 'dead' now :)
13th-Feb-2010 12:21 am (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Well, it's about time! :P

Haha, when Draco comes back Blaise is going to be so freaked out, he's going to think he's like a ghost or a zombie or something. He'll wear garlic around his neck and keep throwing magical herbs at Draco while chanting and saying things like, 'Begone, evil spirit! Back where you came from, you have no business here!' Draco should be very offended. It'll take a doctor's visit before he believes Draco is really alive.
13th-Feb-2010 12:30 am (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Yeah, DracoHe'll be so confused. Lu will take him in, all suspicious, I imagine. l't trust him around Blaise :P
13th-Feb-2010 12:36 am (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Aww, but Blaise will be so happy when he realises Draco is alive! He's totally throw his arms around him and hug him tight and be all like teary eyes, 'I can't believe you're alive. I never thought I would see you again,' and confuse the shit out of Draco even more. And when Draco's all like, "wtf? Why wouldn't I be alive?" Blaise will just cry out, "I thought you went to Peru!" and sob into Draco's shirt.

And then the next day after he's recovered, he'll continue with his murderous shenanigans. This time right under Lucius's nose! Blaise is growing too bold!
13th-Feb-2010 07:29 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
OMG. Blaise, what is with him? XD Draco'll have to get a restraining order on him.
13th-Feb-2010 07:35 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
He only does it for Draco's attention. And he doesn't understand the concept of death. He thinks it's like fleeing the country like his father did. You can always go look for that person later. Blaise is kind of special. he needs looking after.

Shall he make a post about Draco's trip?
13th-Feb-2010 08:33 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Yay! Posting! And lol, Blaise does have issues. Draco'll travel with bodyguards from now on, tasting his food and checking his wine for poisons.
14th-Feb-2010 06:40 pm (UTC) - Re: [mug]
Haha, you know bodyguards are no use against Blaise.

Can Blaise go to jail??? Is Draco still going to contact Harry about someone trying to kill him after he can't back from 'Peru'? Can they catch Blaise and he goes to jail?? :D It's been a while since anyone went to jail.
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